Carmen Van Horn
Today, I swam with the manatees. I spotted a mother manatee and her calf. I held my pose, and she swam under me. She stayed there and chewed her grass. As I continued to be still, she came up for air. I was frozen in awe, as her magnificent body lifted me. She moved over and there as I laid still, I realized that I was hovering above the manatee mother and calf. Did she know that I, too, was a mother? Did she know I meant them no harm?On her beautiful back were scars. Where was the boat that had injured her? This tragedy became her identifying mark. The captain and crew called her “Scar.” She swam under me again, and I wondered if she could tell that I, too, had scars? Could she feel the deep pain that I carry?
I continued to be still and take it all in. She came closer to me as she lifted her great body from the water. She lifted me and I was eye to eye with her scars. Was I so light she did not feel me? Was I so fragile that she wanted to protect me? Our guide said to whisper our secrets to the manatee. So, I did just that. I spoke the names of my husband and children. I told her how I hurt inside because of my great loss.
She once more surfaced and gently carried me. Her nose peeked through the water, and she blew a little water in my face. I cannot be certain, but today I felt as though I made a new friend and a confidant. Someone who listened. Someone who understood my scars. Today I swam with a manatee.
Carmen Van Horn #duncansmom #forever20
